Is Loneliness Just A Solo Date In Disguise?
Oh, to be as confident and powerful as those self-contained, effortlessly chic people you see gliding through life, utterly and wonderfully alone.
You know the type.
They’re the ones who settle into a crowded café with nothing but a Moleskine and an artfully frothed latte, completely comfortable in their own silence.
Or the ones who buy a single ticket to a foreign film and seem to absorb the entire experience without a nervous glance at their phone.
That—that quiet confidence in a public space—is, to me, the ultimate flex.
As much as I identify as an introvert (my ideal Friday night involves my tablet, a spicy BL series, and a chilled bottle of Rosé), there are a host of things I simply would not do by myself.
The reason?
A paralyzing fear that going solo in public would only serve to put a spotlight on my own loneliness.
Seriously, how many times have you seen someone on a self-date who looked genuinely at ease?
I'm talking about someone not glued to their phone, not wearing that painfully expectant, slightly anxious "I’m waiting for someone" expression plastered across their face.
Okay, maybe that’s just me projecting.
If I’m honest, the few times I’ve been out alone, it was because I was meeting someone, and I spent the entire agonizing wait checking my watch and doing complex mental math about whether to order a drink or just flee.
My relief when they finally appeared was less about seeing them and more about the sweet, sweet release from social anxiety.
A single girl, alone at a bustling restaurant. Is she waiting? Is she available? Is she simply... sad?
The questions felt like neon signs flashing above my head and I really didn't want to answer any of them.
The Great Unmasking of My Anxiety
But recently, something shifted.
Stop Hiding. Start Healing. Unlock Your Quiet Confidence.
You've felt the social panic.
You know the exhausting relief of not being alone.
But that fear you're projecting?
It's not about being alone now; it's about a deeper, unmasked anxiety from your past.
The rest of this post is your personal guide out of the social anxiety trap, revealing the deep introspection that led to your breakthrough and the simple practice that healed your nervous system.
✨ Unlock the Healing Journey & The Inner Child Scavenger Hunt!
For just $10 a month on Patreon, you'll instantly unlock:
- The Great Unmasking: The candid revelation about your people-pleasing anxiety and how to stop equating being alone with being sad, rejected, or lonely.
- A New Kind of Rendezvous: The step-by-step journey from anxious waiting to genuine Self-Date enjoyment (and your ambitious public solo goals).
- The 'Inner Child's Choice' Solo Scavenger Hunt: This activity gives you the concrete steps to reconnect with yourself and calm your nervous system by giving your inner child the joy it craves
Ready to drop the anxious facade and absorb the entire experience of life, utterly and wonderfully alone?
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