From Flirting to Forever: It’s Time to Date Your Dollars.

Dahlings, can we have a moment?

After all that deep, unscripted emotional labor we did last week—you know, the part where we finally stopped treating our bank accounts like a toxic ex who only calls at 2 AM—we made a breakthrough. 

We realized money isn't the villain; it's just the fickle, commitment-phobic lover we need to renegotiate our contract with. 

We accepted the current state, we let the anxiety flow, we affirmed the abundance.

 Vibe check? Pass.

Yet even after our spiritual breakthrough, I can't help but wonder, how to make the relationship official?

Because, listen, an empowering mindset is fabulous- it's like a perfectly tailored, vintage Dior dress. But that dress still needs a strong, supportive foundation—the Spanx, if you will—to truly slay the day. 

And that foundation is knowing exactly where your cash is RSVP'ing every month.

The next step, in our navigation of our money relationship, Script-Breaker is simple, non-negotiable, and surprisingly romantic: We are dating our dollars.

Allow me to introduce to you, what I’m going to henceforth call the ‘Date Night’ strategy.

Oh, this is going to be funnnnn.

So, just as you wouldn’t commit to a man after one fun conversation over a martini at during happy hour, you’re not doing that with your money mindset either.

For all my dating ladies, you know that the wooing part of the relationship begins with effort.

 You schedule dates, you ask questions, you observe his habits, you decide if all of that is acceptable into your ecosystem and your money deserves the same respect.

The unscripted way forward isn't just wishing for more; it's becoming intimately familiar with what you have and where it’s going. 

This is the ultimate act of self-love, and it only requires one dedicated Date Night a week.

Are you ready to go on a Money Date,- possibly your first one ever? 

Let’s get down to it. 

First and foremost, the outfit, like on any date is a must.

You absolutely have to dress the part…the catch is instead of searching for your latest charming OOTD, you’re going to do this part mentally. 

So, light a fancy candle, let the smell permeate your space, feel yourself relax, and if it's your vibe, put on some chill background jazz music or slow R&B music, afterall no one wants to be a nervous wreck on date night. 

Now comes the hard part, but I believe in you!

Open up a spreadsheet ( or whatever awesome budgeting app you use).

This isn’t a punishment my darlings, this is a power meeting. And one that you hold all the power in. 

Next, as you would on a date, take a good hard look at what is actually being presented to you, not what you think you should find.

This time instead of it being a possibly attractive person at the end of your gaze, it’s going to be every monetary transaction from the last seven days. 

The $8 latte? The subscription box you forgot existed? The emergency pair of heels? 

Jot them down and just look at them.

Don't judge, just observe.

This may be giving you some post-gasping moments if the numbers start to look a little too real, but I need you to be strong, brave and just observe them, and even welcome that uncomfortable feeling in your gut.

This isn’t about judging or creating a place to cut back, this is about simply observing the reality of where your money spends its time.

A much needed background check if you will. 

So...still with me? Or is that a wine cork popping I just heard?

Put the glass down- okay, just a small sip, but we need to be sober for this.

So now that we’re aware of where the money went this week, it’s time to give your money a job.

That’s right, why should you have to do all the work? 

Every dollar needs a purpose- a category- if you prefer.

I can almost feel your hackles rising through the screen, but this darling isn’t about being restrictive; it’s about directing the energy we talked about in the post Navigating Money Struggles The Unscripted Way 

For instance, this dollar- or- this 'amount of money' is going to 'Rent.'

This one is going to 'Future Self' (aka savings).

This one is going to 'Retail Therapy' (because we're not monsters).

This I hope will help to better empower you into deciding where to allocate the money you do have and also see where it was going before and in what abundance or borderline drought. 

Now I want you to do a Vibe check and ask yourself, "Did this money go toward my unscripted life vision, or did it just wander off with a handsome stranger?"

For those of you, who when you look at the money, it feels like there is absolutely not enough, that’s okay.

This isn't about judging what's available or creating a narrative that could further trigger you, after all, the wanting of more money is just a perpetual state of being at this point no?

This moment right now however, this is about pulling back the veil and allowing yourself to see what you've been watering with your cash.

 This of course may make you feel resonating sensations in your body (especially if it's your first time) - such as panic, pain in the abdomen, fear, any of it… I want you to once again, not judge.

Feel the feelings, welcome them and breathe through them.

They will pass.

The whole point of this exercise isn’t to just trigger you, but to turn your fear of your bank account into facts. 

Then we'll use those facts to regain your power so that you allow yourself to be aware of your relationship with money right now.

And all of this is so you’ll know where you need to develop better chemistry and trust with your cash flow.

It’s also so you can stop treating money like a mystery box and more like the brilliant empire-builder it’s meant to be.

Mindset shifts the energy. 

Tracking directs it. 

That, my darling, is how we build an empire one $8 latte at a time.

Now go schedule that date, and text me the outfit details via my Patreon.

XOXO,

Ashlee